It continues to snow. Big lazy flakes, and the sky is the colour of coffee with cream, overhead, shading to grey at the horizon. It's hard to tell where the tundra ends and the sky begins. Miguel came home this morning with a parka for me that he found on sale at the hardware store. I will be warm. Yesterday it was minus 20 with the windchill...

A co-worker of Miguel's has offered to take him hunting for caribou tomorrow. He can't actually shoot anything, but he's interested to go watch. I'm on call for the shelter this weekend, so I'm sticking close to home.

I went down yesterday to pick up the keys to the shelter, and ended up sitting in the reception area of the centre for half an hour, waiting for the family violence coordinator to return from her errands. A couple of other women were waiting to see her as well, and we were gossiping with the receptionist. I continue to be amazed at how much I've been accepted, it felt very comfortable to sit and talk.

Although the last weekend I was on call I found it a bit hard to sleep, I went to sleep quite quickly last night and didn't wake until my usual time (5:30). I guess you get used to anything.

Spent yesterday filling in for the receptionist at the centre that sponsors the programs I've been helping with. Phone was the same model as at my last place of employment, and I kept having to remind myself what to say when answering the phone. The cultural differences are still a challenge, accents are hard to understand over the phone and last names are amazing... I was in charge of the Food Bank for the afternoon, and I was supposed to get names from those who came for food. They start spelling, and they don't stop til they've given you about twelve letters... I was interested to see that most of the food given out consists of the ingredients for bannock. It was an exhilarating day, in a way, I hung around in the reception area and answered the phone, bagged food in the back room for the Food Bank, chatted to clients and visitors, it's all very laid back.

Last night, to my amazement, the public library was finally open. It has been closed due to the retirement of the former librarian and a general lack of folk willing to take over. There are computers in there, and last night they were all full of hyperactive adolescent boys surfing the net. I can kind of see why it would be difficult to find staff, I can't see most librarians being willing to run the equivalent of a youth centre. However, I was there for the books, and they had a brand-new copy of Peter Robinson's last book. I now have a library card for the May Hakongak Public Library, and a book about local history. Life may be liveable, this winter. People keep shaking their head at me when I say I've only been here since the end of August, saying, "Oh, you're going to find it cold." One man said this to me yesterday and then added, "Just you wait." He even repeated it a couple of times, when I laughed.

Today I went to clean the rooms where we hold the programs. There's supposed to be a janitor, but I noticed that during the two weeks the only cleaning that was getting done was our own efforts. I inquired of my boss, and she said that there was a janitor, but he was... not reliable... My co-worker had cleaned the washroom and kitchen before he went back home, but I wanted to vacuum and wash the floors. Put the radio on and opened all the drapes, found that there was a good mop, begged a vacuum cleaner from the receptionist (at her post today) and made it all nice and clean. Very satisfying. It really is a lovely building, I feel very lucky to be working there. Although I'm technically 'off' this week, with no program until next week, I put in a full day yesterday, half a day today, I'm on call for the shelter again this weekend (get paid for that too) and I'm supposed to go in and help plan the new workshop on the weekend.

Adjusting. Kids have their moments where they talk of missing their friends, our old house, fast food. Miguel is in Yellowknife this weekend, for a meeting. Yesterday since we figured Miguel would be eating out, we talked about going out for dinner to the Lodge, and then to a movie they were showing at the school, War of the Worlds, but at the last minute Kirsten decided she didn't feel well. So I made pancakes for dinner and we watched Shrek on tv. Me and all the kids, on the couch.

Sometimes we go to the store and they don't have what we need. And if both stores don't have it, we can't get it. Cream for coffee is often in short supply. We've gotten the hang of ordering food to be sent up from Yellowknife through food mail. It's good to have fruit and vegetables again. We make our own bread. Somedays most of the bread on the shelves is moldy in the stores, or past its expiry date. My co-worker went to open a package of crackers he had bought for the workshop, and when we started eating them they tasted terrible: two years past their expiry date...

I love cleaning this house. Takes about two hours and everything's clean and tidy. Our old house was too big. And no yard work here! No car, walk to work, no remembering what day is garbage day, no inane free newspapers being delivered, no phone or door-to-door solicitors, no traffic... I can walk around the corner with the dogs and let them run free on the tundra.

The tundra is changing, taking on pockets of snow, and the lakes are frozen crunchy white. The light comes from different and ever-changing angles, the sun seems to move almost visibly in the sky and show different rocks and hollows daily. One night last week I sat on the deck and the sky was bright lime green with northern lights, it felt peaceful, sitting there, and it occurred to me (something I need reminding of periodically) that my concerns are very small, my residual anger and my worries...

Workshops go well. I am learning about a culture that gives high priority to family and kin, and struggles to exist in an encroaching world. We prayed a lot, together, something I haven't done for years, but it felt comforting. The women graduated on Friday, with tears and hugs, next is men for two weeks. I begin to see people I know around town, can't get in and out of anywhere without having to talk to someone.

A lot of emphasis in the workshops on thinking positively (but realistically) and taking one day at a time. Both messages I welcome...